Thursday, January 14, 2010

Wooh!


The plot of my life seems to do nothing but thicken. So here we go...

I was at work minding my own business this morning when someone I know in passing came to talk to me. It took me a minute to realize that the talking had moved to flirting. The flirting moved to us looking into one another's eyes and that led to him giving me his number.

Shocking!

I'm not one to talk to men or flirt. I usually have so much on my mind that i'm just moving along. If men speak to me, I smile and that's about it. In this instance there was nowhere for me to go and I didn't really mind. I felt like a woman.

Anyway...

We talked for a little while and he told me that I was mysterious. I said, "That's a good thing." He just smiled and said, "No it's not." I told him if he wanted predictable he was talking to the wrong woman. Was this me talking or was I having an out of body experience. I've been with my husband so long that I thought I had forgot how to talk to men. I'm not even sure I ever knew. I've been with him since I was a teenager.

So...

I took the number. He asked me for a piece of paper and I knew what that meant. My body got up faster than I wanted it to and I found paper and pen for him. I didn't even know his name. We would say hello if we passed in the hall but never had a real conversation. I don't have a lot of conversations. All I do is think about the new bull shit going on in my life.

Sean...

That's his name. It doesn't really fit. He's a m-a-n and that name is not what I expected him to write down. He kept looking at me with this confused look on his face. When I asked him why he was looking at me like that all he could say was, "You are something else." I'm not sure what he meant by that. I just know I was enjoying the back and forth. I'm very sarcastic and it takes a thick skin to keep up with me. He didn't have a problem with it at all.

Hmm...

What the hell am I doing? Should I have talked to him? I know i'll see him again. What am I going to say when he asks why I didn't call. Should I call? Will I call? I know I want to, but would it be a good idea? Should I use the excuse that my husband has cheated for most of our marriage and now it's my turn to have some fun? Does it matter that my husband and I are getting along really well right now?

Exhaling....

I'm not sure what's going to happen. I have slept with the same man more than half of my life and he has slept with Lord knows how many women. I don't feel guilty about flirting or even taking the number. I'm actually feeling a little giddy. They say that everything happens for a reason. What could the reason be? To make me feel like a woman? Am I being testing?

Scared....

What if I talk to him and I like him? Have I gotten myself into something I cannot handle? Why the hell is a simple phone number spinning me around this way? It's not that i'm out of practice. I guess it's because i've never been in the game. Is this even a game I want to play?

Omission...

Umm, I gave him my number. What if he calls?

Damn....

9 comments:

doll said...

thread carefully

Scorned Woman said...

doll - I think it was exciting at the time. Now i'm on some what the hell did I do....

Young woman on a journey said...

be careful. but also, make sure you don't over think it. it seems like you are planning several scenarios. and its not even necessary. take it as it comes and make decisions then.

Enkay said...

Wow, this is some interesting twist.
I know you'll do the right thing and not let it get out of hand.

happy new year!

THEGAYTEKEEPER said...

I think you are doing what comes naturally to you...if you weren't into this guy on some level you would have turned him down...can't wait to see what happens here...

Karma, Inc. said...

whoa! interesting twist it is! i think u know all of the answers to all of the questions you asked. you had such an interesting conversation with yourself in this entry. you revealed your excitement, provided an excuse for behavior that hasn't happened (your husband's infidelities = makes it ok to have fun), and then you cautioned yourself with some questions (that were expressed as though you already knew the answer). you know what it is boo!!

i say go for it. let things happen as they may of course, don't force anything, but don't deny anything either.

sorry for the analysis. been studying for too many psych exams.

i LOVE your blog.

亮麗 said...

我只知道,假如我去愛人生,那人生一定也會回愛我..................................................

Miss Keia Tha Diva said...

I think you have a situation on your hand her my dear. This is really what gets on my never to but yet you still want to be honest and trust worthy to your mate but if they aren't giving you the love and affection then what are we to do.

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